The Impact of First Failed Relationship


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A lot of us have been in a state where we like someone in a romantic way. A few of us have been romantically involved too. The reason differs though and you will be amazed to know that the reason vary from mere physical needs or just to show off to being madly in love with the one that you can’t imagine life beyond or without them. However the outcome of the relation depends a lot on the reasons behind it.

The reason may have adverse effect on the one involved on a serious level in the relationship of the two. At time to such an extent that the person becomes too upset and decides to end his or her life or become too aloof.

But after all we are talking about the first one. So lets see what are the dynamics of first relationship:

  • knows least what to expect out of it.
  • don’t know how to react to certain scenarios or situations.
  • too excited about it that it keeps you up all night and doesn’t allows you to sleep .
  • get nervous when in public with the one you are in a relationship.

and the list goes on and on. But the thing is this, first relationship has the strength to either make or break you. But it depends on us whether we are broken down or do we get up and move on. Now lets see what kind of an effect does it have.

Just imagine that you are in a relationship and are seriously involved (I know for a few of you it would be just like reliving the days). Now the thing with love is that we at times get too narrow in our perspective of things. Narrow in either direction, as in we oversee any sign that the second person is either cheating on us or is not happy with the way the relation is shaping out or we get too possessive that we try to tie the other person down (Lets be honest with ourselves, the other person is not always wrong; in some cases may be but not always). And then there are situation where the other person was just looking for something casual. Well there is no way of knowing whats going on in the other persons head but if we are paying attention then there are always signs. Sometimes a casual relationship takes a serious turn too.

The relationship which is a serious one tends to humble you. And when a person decides to bend, from either of the sexes its is a difficult decision considering today’s India where both of these are quite self dependent.  

Now how does the a failed relationship impact us?

Well if you are serous about a relationship (let me be clear, a relationship where two people are involved) and it fails, we tend to stop believing. It starts from ourselves, and then grows up to the people who are around us and eventually everything. Even the people we have never met. This distrust leads us to question every philosophy and code we follow. This distrust grows to such an extent that we even start questioning the purpose of life itself and this is the point where the deciding factor of making us or breaking us lies. We can either decide to move ahead or stay there itself for ever. The point however is that even if we decide to move ahead, its never going to be the same. The crack always shows and whatever we do and however nicely we present, it becomes a part of us and attributes to any decision we make in this matter be it on whosoever’s behalf.  

But if we decide to stay there itself, it leads to creation of a hypothetical form of the person whom we were involved with and how we wanted them to be. And in our minds we continue to be in a state of relationship.